Tuesday, 10 May 2011

The power of delete...

There is a magic button on most computers* and this magic button has a simple name. The delete button. This button has an almost godlike power that we should be in awe of. (And possibly a little scared of.) This button has been a wonderful friend and a feared enemy in my time writing, proof reading and editing. Sometimes it does a real good job of eliminating the crap that occasionally shows up in my writing and other times it makes me drop to my knees screaming 'Khan' at the top of my lungs.

This magic button also appears on Facebook - where I have been wielding it like a young padawan with their first light saber.** Though, hopefully I do it with a little more finesse. Yes, I've been doing that dreaded deleting friends thing. And the reason I am writing about it is because it makes me feel tremendously guilty and paranoid - as if those people, who I haven't spoken too in at the least six months and the most a year, are going to start sending me violent emails. Or worse.

So, Facebook and the delete button have me feeling like a quivering mass of jelly (which I hate) while, at the same time, giving me a god like power over who I deem worthy enough to stay on my friends list. This results in me delving ever deeper into my random neuroses. It also gets me wondering what it would be like to have a delete button for everyday events.

For example - you know that tattoo you got when you were just 18 - the really crap one that you thought was awesome at the time. Delete.
Or how about that massive piece of chocolate cake that you just ate and regret. Delete.
Better yet - you know that annoying neighbour who likes to pretend they're having wild sex when they're really only hitting the wall and groaning - delete.

But I can see the trouble that it would get the world in so I will continue to use my delete button on things that really do need to be deleted - like the first five attempts at writing this post and for those people you don't even know who somehow managed to get on your friends list.

And for those people, sorry, but in the words of Cee Lo Green (the clean version anyway) "forget you..."

*I say most because I know that buttons break so there are bound to be some computers out there that don't have a functioning delete button.
**Did anyone else think it was called a light saver when they were younger? Didn't really make a lot of sense to my young brain.


  1. ...you know that annoying neighbour you had sex with....

    I feel guilty too.

    But I would LOVE a real life delete button

  2. You know you've been on facebook too much when you look for a like button for your comment. 'Sigh' :o)

  3. i don't have the heart to delete fb friends...i just set it so i don't see them on my home page.

  4. I found it so hard but, in my case, it was a way for me to cleanse my past, if you excuse how 'new age' that sounds. Though I wish I knew about that setting before...